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alhana Auditor | joined 01 June 2006 | 91 posts


Will Esmi Cause Mandati/Warrior-Prophet Drama? posted 24 August 2006 in The Thousandfold ThoughtWill Esmi Cause Mandati/Warrior-Prophet Drama? by alhana, Auditor

While I agree that Akka was limited because he was "world born", maybe the other issue one all long-term couples face...they were both set in their ways. Not until they were separated that they realized things about each other that they had never questioned and it is not only their culture that limits them but their own routines. Akka never offered and Esmi never asked, but when Akka realized that Esmi could read, he reflected on that the fact that it never occurred to him that she wanted to learn. Likewise the issue of having a child, Esmi never offered and Akka never asked her to give up her womb to have his child, both of them assuming that their lives were too uncertain.

How many modern couples after having loved each other and lost the other to ANOTHER, are awakened by how much they took the other person for granted? She says, "You never had that kind of passion for me" and He says, "You never honored me like you honor HIM". I am not ready to blame Akka's "world-born" origin for why he didn't appreciate Esmi or treat her differently. I think that they needed someone like Kellhus to challenge their very existence in order for them to see each other differently. Many couples do look at each other differently after an affair, after a forced separation, after a loss of a child/parent, or after a serious illness or near-death experience.

You raise a good point about Esmi reaching a higher level of freedom as Kellhus' wife. I still fear that she will be limited in her status and just become another pawn in his plans. view post


Heresiarch of the Cishaurim posted 01 September 2006 in The Thousandfold ThoughtHeresiarch of the Cishaurim by alhana, Auditor

I saw a parallel between "crucifix" of Christianity upon which Jesus Christ was put to death by the Romans and "circumfix" that Kellhus was placed upon to die.

I believe that Bakker intentionally wrote the details of the two religious factions vauge to illustrate that at the root of religions, like Christianity and Islam, there is really not much difference. A couple hundred years ago different European factions of Christianity were burning each other at the stake, even though they all believed in the teachings of Jesus Christ. As in the world of Earwe, any time there is a "holy war" or "jihad" it is less about the details of doctrine and more about the placement of power. view post


September 11th posted 15 September 2006 in Philosophy DiscussionSeptember 11th by alhana, Auditor

On 9/11/01, I was living a very undirected and rather routine life. I got up, took care of the details of the day, and went back to bed. I was in a transition period and felt I was in an everlasting fog. I was struggling with a depressive and blaise existence. That morning, as I woke up, the first plane had just crashed and then I was suddenly wake.....something that did not usually happen till many hours into my day. Then I watched the next plane crash and the next and the next..and then the dizzy media and information frenzy that followed. Living in the NW US, we didn't know if there would be another plane that would hit a target in the NW and take out a power plant or a major dam that could flood an entire region. In an instant, my miserable and rather boring life exploded and I knew that the things that I was alllowing to make me miserable were nothing compared to the misery I was witnessing.

I turned a corner in my life that day. Over the next few weeks, I patched up relationships that needed reconcilation not wanting to be like the woman I saw on the TV that had never been able to say she was sorry and take back the hurtful words she said to her husband the night before. I had a baby, a 9/11 baby, and that child continues to be the source of merriment and inspiration as I realize that without the hope of the next generation we have nothing. And finally, I broke out of an oppessive religious sect that had me mired down in guilt and condemnation to seek true spiritual awakening.

But this year, I mentioned to someone that it had been 5 years and she said, "I am not focusing on that because I do not want to focus my mental enegry on fear or terror, but peace." Though this event touched my life and pushed me to make positive changes in my life, I realized that she was right. The more we focus on the wrongs that others have done to us, there can be no forgiveness. Mother Theresa once said that she would not support an anti-war rally but she would always attend a pro-peace convention.

So, I embrace peace and not on terror. Though I am not perfect, I will stop focusing on the negative things in my life and on the positive ways I can make good the focus of my energy. I will continue to strive to live the days of my life to make an account for the life in my days. view post


Heresiarch of the Cishaurim posted 19 September 2006 in The Thousandfold ThoughtHeresiarch of the Cishaurim by alhana, Auditor

Last night as I was looking over some of the passages at the end of TTT when Kellhus and his father are talking, it occurred to me there is another "biblical" parralel here. In the book of Genesis, two mighty nations begin a conflict that stretches to the present age and was conceived in the birth of two sets of brothers. The first was Ishamel, the father of the nations who are Arabic today and Issac, who became the heir to Abraham's nation of "the chosen people." The second set of brothers were Esau, who was first born twin to Issac but was denied his birthright for Jacob who later became known as Israel. Legend has it that Esau may have joined forces with the tribes of Ishamel when he was denied his birthright.

Ishamel represents a people who were cast out. Ishamel's mother was a maidservant given to Abraham by his wife Sarah because she could not conceive. Later when Sarah became pregnant and bore her own son, she got jealous of the son by another woman and Abraham sent Ishamel and his mother into the desert. Ishamel had the right to claim Abraham's inheritance, but he was denied it and left to die. He was saved by an angel who gave them water and then they were rescued by a tribe of nomads. Some speculate that this event sparked the intial anomosity between the two tribes of Abraham, the Muslims and the Jews.

I wonder if when Esmi's baby is born, if the reminder of Serwe will poison her mind and if she will fear for the "position" of her own son and ask that Moehengus be removed from the family. I think some sort of power struggle between these two sons will happen at some point and could have some similarities to these biblical siblings. view post


The new craze posted 03 October 2006 in Philosophy DiscussionThe new craze by alhana, Auditor

These shootings seem to go in cycles. I remember that 1999 was a particulary bad year for school shootings too. One goes, then another, then another. One of the initial reports that I read late this afternoon seemed to indicate this one at the Amish school today could have been a copycat shooting. With each very vivid, very detailed news report about another shooting, we plant the seed of the idea in the next killer's mind. These people involved in these shootings probably gave out warning signs of their internal confusion, but no one listened. But our over-active US News Media gave them one last platform from which to rage at the world. They probably felt insignificant in life, but in the end they achieved notority.

When one focuses on negative, negative is returned in kind. I rarely watch the news anymore for this reason. I do not want to dwell on the evil that will enivitably happen; I educate myself, but I leave out all the "bad news" that focuses only on what is going wrong and not what is going right. I "scan" headlines in various written forms throughout my day. I try not to focus on this kind of senseless and inconvicible violence but instead on what made the person behind it finally give up. What would have happened today if someone had given this man a word of encouragement or a kind deed? What if someone had thought to reach out to a hurting man and give him kindness or just even listened to him? Maybe everything would have still turned out the way it did, but maybe not. I will take the chance that my kindness and receptive attitudes toward others might make a difference so that if this kind of person came across my path maybe they would chose life instead of death. view post


Other forums frequented posted 04 October 2006 in Off-Topic DiscussionOther forums frequented by alhana, Auditor

I spend some time on two online game related boards...cuz I am a geek...too White and Nerdy. view post


The new craze posted 04 October 2006 in Philosophy DiscussionThe new craze by alhana, Auditor

As with any problem of human behavior, this school shooting craze does not have one cause. It is about society, violence, the media lust for reporting violence, the decay of families, bulllying at school, too much free time for pre-adults, too little time to be kids, sexual abuse, physical abuse, emotional abuse, the lack of a belief in Anything that gives hope, not letting boys be boys, mental health issues, and the general loss of innocence.

As yet, there has not been a single female shooter. (I am sure next week there will be one just to prove me wrong.) The only common factor about all of the shootings, starting with the notorious McDonald's shooting in the 80s in Southern California to this week's Amish school massacare is that they were all male. Something is happening to the young men of the last two generations that is causing them to lose focus on reality and decide that violence is the only way. Women turn their rage inward and men turn their rage outward. We don't teach our sons how to express their rage in a healthy way...we just tell them not to fight. Until Society as a whole figures out a way to rescue our young men from the demons that plague them, they will continue to stage these very brutal and very public way to get the point across that they are angry at the world.

With that, I am going to go make a cup of cocoa for my son and read him a story <!-- s8) --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_cool.gif" alt="8)" title="Cool" /><!-- s8) --> view post


HAIR posted 06 October 2006 in Off-Topic DiscussionHAIR by alhana, Auditor

I think my hair says...Hey I'm a woman and I am a mom. I do it up when I go to a local social event like once a year, but I just don't care to spend time on it. I have better things to do. Like sit here and post about my hair <!-- s:wink: --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_wink.gif" alt=":wink:" title="Wink" /><!-- s:wink: -->

It has red highlights (thanks to a little help from Clariol) and it says, sweet and saucy. It is naturally curly so it just does its own thing, especially if it rains, so that is sort of the.....Wild hair thing, free spirit and what not. I don't think I planned for my hair to say that..but it does. Which suits my personality I suppose. I don't take the time to make my hair express anything else but maybe that is an expresssion in itself...that I am a natural woman...... view post


HAIR posted 06 October 2006 in Off-Topic DiscussionHAIR by alhana, Auditor

Same here....in fact the less I brush it the better it is. I usually comb it when I first get out of the shower, but just let it hang after that. If I have to &quot;comb&quot; it, like if I go outside and the wind blows it around, I wet it down and put some mousse on my fingers to restyle it.

I knew what Gierra was talking about.

I wore pony tails a little in my hair before I cut it over a year ago, parted down the middle and gathered behind my ears. If I have to pull it back now, my favorite is to wear a baseball cap and pull the hair out the back through the hole. Or gather it all up in big clip in the back. But if I do put it in pony tales or pull it back and clip it ..and go outside in humidity..I have little curls that spring up all over the top of my head like a red-topped Q-tip!!!! There is an episode of (gasp I know it is low-brow) Friends, when they go to the Bahamas and Monica's hair went crazy...getting all frizzy and huge like a white girl afro. Well...it is true...that happened to me when I went to Georgia one September. I thought it was an exaggration on TV...but it wasn't! view post


success posted 06 October 2006 in Philosophy Discussionsuccess by alhana, Auditor

I agree with Gierra, Mahajanga. For many people in the modern world, we do not see offspring as a measure of a person's success, or even marriage for that matter. I do think however, that many people later in life achieve material and personal success and even spiritual enlightenment, only to find their are still empty because they have no one to &quot;pass on&quot; their wealth of knowledge and experience and material possessions. The desire to have children is a strong evolutionary drive that ensures the survive of our species. With the ability to &quot;preserve&quot; one's exist in writing and other forms of self-express, there are some people who never feel that need as they see themselves being &quot;reproduced&quot; through their own work and their mentoring of others.

I would say that happiness come from my inner sense of harmony with the intentions of the Universe, as Maha stated, that are symbolized by mental and spiritual clarity, despite what &quot;world-born&quot; circumstances I face. My contentment is expressed in having a family, a home, and a job that I love where I can express the gifts I have been given and finally true friends that have lasted me my adult life.

It is dangerous to say though that the things that bring me contentment also give me happiness because my house could burn down, my job could be lost, my children can be demanding and challenging, and my friends may eventually die or even move away so that I lose touch with them. The &quot;things&quot; that give us happiness can be lost; however, our sense of self can never be destroyed because it is ours alone. If I let the impact of events and people in my life affect how &quot;happy&quot; or &quot;unhappy&quot; I am, then I too might lose my sense of self and fall into a pit of altered reality, i.e., depression, frustration, rage, and even suicidal or homicidal thoughts. If instead I focus to always live in harmony with others, push aside the negative energy in the world and reach toward what is creative, kind, loving, beautiful, abundant, receptive, and allowing for expanding growth, then I am happy. (That by the way is not my own principal, but one I learned from someone else's spiritual work. It rings true in my own experience.) I do believe in God, but that Image looks much less like the version from my Protestant upbringing and more and more like the Transendant Being of World Religions. It does give me peace to be able to let go of certain issues that I don't understand and rely on faith to ease my emotional burden.

It is not that I do not acknowledge that the negative exists, but that when bad things happen, I try not to fight the negative, but also I resist the urge to embrace it. When one dwells on suffering and pain, it is hard to let go and move into a place of health and healing, especially if the pain and suffering were caused by another person, against our will.

Now least you all think my life is ideal, it is not. I have had lose and death and even abuse in my life. I still need to practice this way of thinking on a daily basis in order to focus always on the happiness and contentment I seek for my life. view post


what do you do posted 10 October 2006 in Off-Topic Discussionwhat do you do by alhana, Auditor

I am currently engaged in a long-term, domestic-based experiment to determine if three male hairless albino monkeys can be socialized to become productive members of society, along with the estate management of the experimental station, including but not limited to:

Nutrition Services and Gourmet Application of Food Science
Acquistion of Food and Estate Supplies
Clothing Cleaning and Distribution and Repair
Grounds Keeper and Gardner
Transportation Services
Religious and Spiritual Curriculm Development and Daily Application
Financial and Fiscal Management
First Aid and Minor Emergency Response
Sports Trainer and Referee
Educational Tutor
Environmental and Disaster Clean Up
Animal Science and Routine Care, including Emergency Surgery on Hamsters

That is just my full-time job.

The rest of the time, I do spend about 15-20 hours as a Licensed Clinical Social Worker at a Family Therapy Clinic.

Oh yeah, I am also a Full Time Escort for a Domestic Partner, but that might get X-rated <!-- s:twisted: --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_twisted.gif" alt=":twisted:" title="Twisted Evil" /><!-- s:twisted: --> view post


psychological affects of ranks in forums posted 10 October 2006 in Philosophy Discussionpsychological affects of ranks in forums by alhana, Auditor

Wow......

*forms an alliance with Gierra as the other human girl* view post


what do you do posted 10 October 2006 in Off-Topic Discussionwhat do you do by alhana, Auditor

Yeah, but the way I typed it sounds more interesting...... view post


psychological affects of ranks in forums posted 10 October 2006 in Philosophy Discussionpsychological affects of ranks in forums by alhana, Auditor

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *rude sign* view post


How would you define religion? posted 10 October 2006 in Philosophy DiscussionHow would you define religion? by alhana, Auditor

I personally believe that religion is the &quot;practice and ceremonies and rules&quot; that one uses for formal, organized, corporate worship within their society.

I believe that spirituality is the beliefs that one holds personally and the personal experiences about those beliefs.

Sometimes these are the same, but a person can experience spirituality without religion. view post


what do you do posted 10 October 2006 in Off-Topic Discussionwhat do you do by alhana, Auditor

You also made the assumption that I am married <!-- s:lol: --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_lol.gif" alt=":lol:" title="Laughing" /><!-- s:lol: --> view post


psychological affects of ranks in forums posted 10 October 2006 in Philosophy Discussionpsychological affects of ranks in forums by alhana, Auditor

We, the Peralogues, will not be silenced!!!! We demand the abilities of free posting, intellecutual diaherra, and other such forum rights!!!

You can not keep us in our rooms!!!!!

FREEDOM!!!!!!!!! view post


psychological affects of ranks in forums posted 11 October 2006 in Philosophy Discussionpsychological affects of ranks in forums by alhana, Auditor

We have Mahaj on our side too!!!! She was around here somewhere...she must haven been silenced by the upper eschelon of the ranks!!!!

Fine..I will be silent..for now...but I go seething in righteous fury and waiting the time when I become a sub-dictate and bring change and order to the New Forum!!!!!!!

*feigns submission and begins slowly poisoning the wine and food served in evil executives while wooing those kind executives with an ear for the oppression of the masses*

*begins midnight message writing of hope and inspiration in the crowded bunks of the peralouges to the masses who serve the executives in order to one day rise up and overthrow the Dictates with the help of Benevolent Benefactors found among their ranks* view post


psychological affects of ranks in forums posted 12 October 2006 in Philosophy Discussionpsychological affects of ranks in forums by alhana, Auditor

I still play D&amp;D.....&lt;&lt;&lt;&lt;&lt;&lt;geek. view post


Who will be President in 2008 posted 13 October 2006 in Philosophy DiscussionWho will be President in 2008 by alhana, Auditor

Even though there are many factions, there is really only two political parties in the US. Without winning a primary election, one cannot not readily get on a ballot in any state for the office of President. Ross Perot had a good run at in back in the 90s, but he had to have representatives in every state working to get him on the national ballot. Those who run as a Democratic or Republican can do so simply by becomng their party's national representative. At the State Election level, one will find more diversity and some states have as many as 5 or 6 parties running for a State Legislative Position.

I am undecided. With a year to read and study the facts, I won't even speculate who I will be voting for. view post


psychological affects of ranks in forums posted 13 October 2006 in Philosophy Discussionpsychological affects of ranks in forums by alhana, Auditor

My most humble apologies Mahaj! For some reason when I read one of your earlier posts, I came away with the impression you were female <!-- s:oops: --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_redface.gif" alt=":oops:" title="Embarassed" /><!-- s:oops: --> . That is problem with such methods of communication!!!!!!!

*helps Brother Mahaj back to the peralouge barracks for bum healing while whispering, &quot;We have not surrendered, we are just regrouping&quot;* view post


Paraskavedekatriphobia Anyone?*Fear of Friday the 13th* posted 13 October 2006 in Off-Topic DiscussionParaskavedekatriphobia Anyone?*Fear of Friday the 13th* by alhana, Auditor

On a day when the British Medical Journal recommends that you should stay at home, I thought I would start a discussion to see how people here feel about Friday the 13th and other superstitions. It is estimated that between $800 and $900 million dollars will be lost today because people refuse to bank or do business. In France, some people would hire themselves out as the &quot;14th Guest&quot; or quatorzien to ward off bad luck that might befall the &quot;13th Guest&quot;. I personally have no fear of the day and I am planning to dine out with friends this evening. Since it also falls in October this time, some people are doubly &quot;freaked out&quot; by this most unlucky day falling in the month of haunting.

I would love to read stories about your own good or bad luck associated with Friday the 13th and other symbols. view post


psychological affects of ranks in forums posted 20 October 2006 in Philosophy Discussionpsychological affects of ranks in forums by alhana, Auditor

Laughs until her sides hurt....... view post


Who will be President in 2008 posted 20 October 2006 in Philosophy DiscussionWho will be President in 2008 by alhana, Auditor

I just trying to read through the numberous Ballot Measures that are on my ballot. My state does print out an &quot;information&quot; pamplet. It is non-paritsan with the legal language of the measure and a &quot;real folk&quot; explanation. It also includes the various lobby groups that are pushing for the ballot measure to list their opinions. This is helpful because then I can see who will benefit from the measure in addition to what the measure is really about.

As for the candidates on my ballot next month.....I don't have a clue. Our governor is up and he just might get outed if the political machine of the other major party can swing the &quot;too much taxes&quot; vote. On the other hand, the gas prices are dropping, the interest rates have stayed low and so people are not feeling the &quot;gloom and doom&quot; economic crunch.

As for &quot;colorful&quot; candidates, I was going out with some friends this summer and we were going to hit a &quot;alternative&quot; strip club. When we got there, an &quot;adult entertainment star&quot; who was running for some election in her home state was the featured dancer. The club wanted to charge us $25 to get in ....at 1:30 am. Needless to say, the desire to support &quot;free speech&quot; by paying the high cover charge outweighed my budget for the evening, so we all agreed to go back to the hotel room and drink there. I guess it illustrated some creative campaign fund raising though!!!! view post


Who will be President in 2008 posted 20 October 2006 in Philosophy DiscussionWho will be President in 2008 by alhana, Auditor

Here here!!!!! Although I am pretty sure I don't want to see Ms. Clinton in pasties <!-- s:twisted: --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_twisted.gif" alt=":twisted:" title="Twisted Evil" /><!-- s:twisted: --> view post


Who will be President in 2008 posted 20 October 2006 in Philosophy DiscussionWho will be President in 2008 by alhana, Auditor

Or Al Gore in Leather Chaps.....without boxers on...... view post


psychological affects of ranks in forums posted 25 October 2006 in Philosophy Discussionpsychological affects of ranks in forums by alhana, Auditor

The mightiest of warriors can be swayed by the soft and tempting touch of the whore. Remember Samson?

*floods Harrol's senses with hypnotic perfumes, promises of pleasure beyond measure as well as rest and reprieve from fighting* view post


Paraskavedekatriphobia Anyone?*Fear of Friday the 13th* posted 26 October 2006 in Off-Topic DiscussionParaskavedekatriphobia Anyone?*Fear of Friday the 13th* by alhana, Auditor

Yeah, Celts forever cuz mooning people by lifting up your kilt is just the best intimidation tactic EVER!!!!!

Hey wait..I just joined in the hijack of my own post!!!!! <!-- s:evil: --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_evil.gif" alt=":evil:" title="Evil or Very Mad" /><!-- s:evil: --> view post


psychological affects of ranks in forums posted 26 October 2006 in Philosophy Discussionpsychological affects of ranks in forums by alhana, Auditor

*flees Harrol's tent when she sees the &quot;trash&quot; being flung by her leader, Gierra and looks for a better custom* view post


Scott Bakker ruined it for me. posted 27 October 2006 in Off-Topic DiscussionScott Bakker ruined it for me. by alhana, Auditor

I just started Earagon, the first book of the Inheirtance Series and coming soon to the a thearter near you this December! My oldest son read the book and we just bought the second book, Eldest that he is going to read as soon as he finishes Harry Potter, Half-Blood Prince again.

Just like anything else in life, I try not to compare as this limits one's judgement to make one thing &quot;better than&quot; and another thing &quot;bad&quot;. I just enjoy well written literature. On the other hand, Mr. Bakker has raised the bar for what I consider to be &quot;well written&quot;. In my opinion, the English language has become rather compromised in the over-use of slang, Webspeak, and outright bad grammar; I think it is great when an author produces a work of epic proportions that reminds us that the written word can still be an art. view post


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