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success posted 06 Oct 2006, 13:10 by gierra, Sorcerer-of-Rank

what is your idea of success? what would you have to have in your life to consider yourself successful? view post

posted 06 Oct 2006, 13:10 by Harrol, Moderator

To not be moved by the darkness that comes before :) That is a great question and the answer to that always changes. Once I achieve a goal and am successful I am always off to the next goal. I will save what I truly see as being successful for another time because it would sound totally foreign to people. view post

posted 06 Oct 2006, 13:10 by gierra, Sorcerer-of-Rank

:p cop out. in a way, this thread was inspired by the one about school shootings. about how people base their lives around the wrong things, things they can never acheive and how that just creates these sad little ungrateful people. to me, if i own a home, have a happy life and healthy children i'll be pretty dang happy. if there's a ton of land surrounding said house, and i can build a barn to use as a workshop, and have gardens to work in when it's sunny and some horses to ride and care for, i'd be pretty overjoyed. view post

posted 06 Oct 2006, 15:10 by Harrol, Moderator

Okay so I copped out. Well I would like to have a wife and children. I also sincrerely hope the kids aren't like me when I was young :twisted: . I would consider myself successful if my marriage worked and after 40 years we still loved each other and also if my children turn out to exceed me that would be great. view post

posted 06 Oct 2006, 15:10 by Hellscythe, Auditor

Success? I would call my life a success when I have a family of my own, and am able to live a happy life. That would be my idea of a successful life view post

posted 06 Oct 2006, 16:10 by Mahajanga Mordecai, Auditor

To be a success I must achieve: 1. Spiritual clarity and certainty 2. Psychological stability (as in becoming a self-moving soul in as much as is possible... to quote a familiar author) 3. Maintaining life-long friends - staying away from superfluous "friends" 4. Being financially stable The family thing doesn't really come-up for me. Now I'm stuck wondering why, since it's obviously a staple for the average person. view post

posted 06 Oct 2006, 16:10 by gierra, Sorcerer-of-Rank

[quote="Mahajanga Mordecai":13u4hjgc] The family thing doesn't really come-up for me. Now I'm stuck wondering why, since it's obviously a staple for the average person.[/quote:13u4hjgc] guess that depends on your definition of normal. i don;t think there's anything wrong with not having that urge to have children and such.. i dunno how old you are, but i know that all my life i figured i'd never marry and never have kids.. it's only been in the last year or 2 that i have really had thoughts about it. i have many friends who have accepted that kids are just something they will never want, and it's perfectly normal. view post

posted 06 Oct 2006, 19:10 by alhana, Auditor

I agree with Gierra, Mahajanga. For many people in the modern world, we do not see offspring as a measure of a person's success, or even marriage for that matter. I do think however, that many people later in life achieve material and personal success and even spiritual enlightenment, only to find their are still empty because they have no one to "pass on" their wealth of knowledge and experience and material possessions. The desire to have children is a strong evolutionary drive that ensures the survive of our species. With the ability to "preserve" one's exist in writing and other forms of self-express, there are some people who never feel that need as they see themselves being "reproduced" through their own work and their mentoring of others. I would say that happiness come from my inner sense of harmony with the intentions of the Universe, as Maha stated, that are symbolized by mental and spiritual clarity, despite what "world-born" circumstances I face. My contentment is expressed in having a family, a home, and a job that I love where I can express the gifts I have been given and finally true friends that have lasted me my adult life. It is dangerous to say though that the things that bring me contentment also give me happiness because my house could burn down, my job could be lost, my children can be demanding and challenging, and my friends may eventually die or even move away so that I lose touch with them. The "things" that give us happiness can be lost; however, our sense of self can never be destroyed because it is ours alone. If I let the impact of events and people in my life affect how "happy" or "unhappy" I am, then I too might lose my sense of self and fall into a pit of altered reality, i.e., depression, frustration, rage, and even suicidal or homicidal thoughts. If instead I focus to always live in harmony with others, push aside the negative energy in the world and reach toward what is creative, kind, loving, beautiful, abundant, receptive, and allowing for expanding growth, then I am happy. (That by the way is not my own principal, but one I learned from someone else's spiritual work. It rings true in my own experience.) I do believe in God, but that Image looks much less like the version from my Protestant upbringing and more and more like the Transendant Being of World Religions. It does give me peace to be able to let go of certain issues that I don't understand and rely on faith to ease my emotional burden. It is not that I do not acknowledge that the negative exists, but that when bad things happen, I try not to fight the negative, but also I resist the urge to embrace it. When one dwells on suffering and pain, it is hard to let go and move into a place of health and healing, especially if the pain and suffering were caused by another person, against our will. Now least you all think my life is ideal, it is not. I have had lose and death and even abuse in my life. I still need to practice this way of thinking on a daily basis in order to focus always on the happiness and contentment I seek for my life. view post

posted 06 Oct 2006, 21:10 by Warrior-Poet, Moderator

To achieve Nirvana. view post

posted 09 Oct 2006, 11:10 by Harrol, Moderator

Well I am fulfilled now without a wife and children. Yet for some strange reason I want to have a family but I would still have had a successful life without having a family. Happiness is so fleeting that I do not dwell on emotions or feelings. You to some degree have to tell yourself how to feel or you will be tossed around by the storms of life and have no control. view post


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