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dusted off in read-only


you have to hear this! posted 16 Mar 2006, 07:03 by Edge of Certainty, Subdidact

you guys 'll get a kick outa this: I finished TTT not too long ago, and, tho the ending was not as happy as I expected, the way I finished the book was perfect! Ok, I was at walmart with my good friend ron (he was looking for something for his girlfriend for her birthday) and I happened to have brought TTT with me. As he obsessed over what color lingerie she might wear, I decided to finish the book. I was about 50 pages away and as I read, this old hillbilly who was wearin some kinda animal skin coat (not even joking) came and sat next to me. He took a long sigh and asked, "Whacha readin in them thur book hoss? (exact words! :lol: I swear!). Now, I can't resist from explaining a good book to someone, even complete strangers. So I started from TDTCB and summarized as best I could the entire series...And he looked at me and he almost screamed, "SOUNDS LIKES THE WORK OF THE DEVIL TO ME!" And from there we made a big scene in the middle of walmart, I. pointlessly trying to defend the series and trying to show this strange man the utter genius in it, and he continued to rant and rave about how I was gunna burn with Hitler and all them "Calaforni Liberals." It's funny now, but at the time, I was enfuriated. I don't wana go into detail, but we went from a heated argument to name calling to the point were I was starting to roll up my cuffs. Luckily by that time, we got so loud that one of the employees had called the police (this guy was about a foot taller than I am). So we were both halled off down town and put into holding (by that time walmart had confiscated TTT cuz they thought it was merchandice). The cops let me off with a warning but I had to apologize to the hillibilly first! :roll: Appearently they had decided that I was to blame...who's to say I wasn't? Oh well. Before they "let me back into society" an employee from walmart came to give me back TTT because appearently walmart doesn't carry it (go figure) . And I didn't have a ride (ron had picked me up) so as a certain officer Jones (nice guy) drove me back to my appartment, I finally finished the last 48 pages. And [b:15t0twbq]that[/b:15t0twbq] is how [i:15t0twbq]I[/i:15t0twbq] finished TTT.....I swear on the grave of my dead cat, fifi, that this entire story is completely true! view post

Ha! posted 16 Mar 2006, 08:03 by Kidruhil Lancer, Auditor

That is probably the funniest thing I've heard all week. Seriously. view post

posted 16 Mar 2006, 11:03 by Warrior-Poet, Moderator

The funniest thing Ive heard all month. view post

posted 16 Mar 2006, 20:03 by Xray the Enforcer, Auditor

That's awesome. Shit, I wish my reading experiences were so .... energetic. 'Round here, the plebes just roll up their eyes and ask why you don't read something sensible, like David Foster Wallace. :roll: I don't mind a fisticuffs, but I sure as hell am not going to engage in one over that troll-boy. view post

posted 16 Mar 2006, 20:03 by Edge of Certainty, Subdidact

yeah, you should seen this guy, seriously. He by far towered over me and he had a beard that looked like it could house several critters. :lol: . It's fun, tho, when folks like that come out of the back-woods. They always make some kinda commotion. view post

posted 16 Mar 2006, 20:03 by gierra, Sorcerer-of-Rank

-sniff- that's beautiful, man! if it were me, i probably woulda decked the hillbilly. i have about 50 or sopages left of TTT, so maybe i'll have a funny story too. but i'll probably just finish it on the subway, or while sitting in my bed procrastinating dinner. view post

posted 17 Mar 2006, 02:03 by Zarathinius, Auditor

Fantastic. Absolutely fantastic. In your place, I would have probably sat quietly waiting for the guy to quiet down and feel foolish for making a commotion, but in this case the humor/drama value is just so great that it must have been totally worth it. Keep that memory with you forever, since few of us will ever experience such a fantastic coincidence. view post

posted 17 Mar 2006, 02:03 by Edge of Certainty, Subdidact

thanks...I'll definitely not forget this anytime soon...tho, if I had to actually do community service or anything of the like, I'd be less inclined to try and remember that it ever happened :lol: the real lesson here is, if anyone were to grasp the thousandfold though, it wouldn't be hillbillies.... view post

posted 17 Mar 2006, 13:03 by Twayleph, Auditor

Hilarious ! Great story Edge of Certainty, I'm sure Scott will be proud :D view post

posted 17 Mar 2006, 21:03 by TollofDays, Peralogue

Amazing. Absolutley amazing. And that is exactly why i have stopped going to Wal-mart. Great story. view post

posted 04 May 2006, 05:05 by Nauticus, Auditor

Wonderful story. The only thing better, is if you actually knocked him out, over TTT ;) view post


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